Boston, MA - Hello Sir/Madam. We are writing this article to warn you that your extended Husky Card warranty is about to expire. You should've received a notice in the mail about your card's extended warranty eligibility - perhaps it was sent to your previous dorm room.
If you wish to subscribe to our mailing list - don’t worry, you already are. Northeastern Yammer notifications double as our cold email list about extended warranty Husky cards, lottery notifications for giving day, online surveys about diversity which result in nothing, family members requesting money be paypalled for your school costs, professors assigning fake quiz links, links to a fake website called “NuWorks”, and of course - nigerian princes requesting you sign in their friend into the dorm.
Since we've not gotten a response, we're giving you a final courtesy call before we close out your file. Subscribe to The Husky Husky to be removed and placed on our do-not-call list. To speak to someone about possibly extending or reinstating your card’s warranty, press 1 to speak with a warranty specialist.
If you’re wondering why no new articles have been written for 2 weeks - press 2 to fuck off it was finals week and we’re lazy.
