Boston, MA - My fellow Chirpy Chunky Happy Healthy Huskies this is Dan, the Husky Husky tech correspondent. I recently took a small break from writing (and no one noticed) but I had to come back to report on the latest tech out of Northeastern. Recently, NEU Gigs has launched a new Mob Justice Service by the name of NUDoxx. I got the chance to chat with the creator of this new program courtesy of the following exclusive Husky Husky interview.
Dan - I don’t know if I should say good morning or good afternoon. It’s 2pm but you are still wearing those silly orange pajamas.
NEUgigs - This is actually a bodysuit from the OSCCR Correctional Facility. I’ve just gotten out of there, I got arrested for doxxing Aoun over a tweet.
Dan - Yikes, anyway let’s start with my first question. How did the idea for NUDoxx come to fruition?
NEUgigs - You see I run this page, this wonderful and amazing page, it’s huge, the hugest one in Northeastern ever and it’s called NEU Gigs. I started it because my girlfriend from BU dumped me for some guy that rows crew at Harvard. But anyway, I was sitting in Curry managing my huge page and I got a weird request. Some guy wanted me to doxx someone because they had said that they didn’t like Avatar. I was furious, really furious so I used that page to doxx the guy, I leaked his OnlyFans, his Twitter, his LinkedIn, I leaked everything. I got such a hard on that I couldn’t even move, so I decided this was what I wanted to do.
Dan - Awesome, people really like the prospect of internet mobs. I want to know more about NUDoxx. How does the service work?
NEUgigs - Well, it’s a patented process so if you try to copy it my dad is going to sue you ok? I’m serious I even have the paperwork and all.
Dan - I swear I would never try to copy it.
NEUgigs - Good, even if you tried it is such a high IQ idea that some normie like you would not get it. The service is awesome and it works, it really works. I just go through my DMs and if I see someone I don’t like, I screenshot it and then I post it. Then I put a really good caption, and I say they are racist using my alt account. The mob then shows up and does the job. It’s beautiful, one time this guy said that he didn’t order the same thing as me in Rebecca’s (A JFK with triple ketchup that he allegedly calls “the Dallas special”) and I doxxed him. I called him a sandwich supremacist and let the mob have him. They burnt him at stake and attacked his family.
Dan - That does sound a little intense. However, all this talk about posting has raised the question as to why you don’t have your own platform. Does this have to do with the rumors that you never actually passed Fundies and that you’re too scared to use Squarespace?
NEUgigs - Ah those rumors, they’re nothing but fake news. I am the best coder that I know and I can code. I code a lot, all the time. I know the languages, all of the programming languages that exist. I can even speak P++ and Cython fluently. My skill is beyond what most people can ever comprehend. I just haven’t coded my own platform because I am a very busy person. So busy, I’m always doxxing people or in very important meetings. You know I would show you my transcript but you would cry.
Dan - Sounds very impressive if you ask me. One last question because your parents told me they have to use the basement soon. What’s next for your NEU Gigs venture and what additions do you plan on implementing to NUDoxx?
NEUgigs - I have something big, very big, in store for next year. I’ll give you a sneak peak because I’m that generous and awesome. A lot of people are going to come back and all of those people, they have someone they don’t like. A lot of people that have different opinions, we can’t have that. So I’m gonna expand a lot more, I plan on twitter cancellations, getting people fired from co-op. Stuff no one in their right mind would try. But I’m an innovator and I’m a CS major, the best CS major on campus. I’m gonna do it, and if it doesn’t work I’ll call everyone who disagrees with me a racist, fascist, poo face.
